Thursday, April 30, 2009
Reference:
by Marshall Goldsmith, Ph.D.
[Talent Management Magazine November 2007]
Success can make us superstitious in how we behave. Specifically, four beliefs - that we have the skills, the confidence, the motivation and the choice to succeed - lead us to this mindset.
Some of you are probably thinking, "No way! I'm not superstitious. I know exactly why I'm successful: because I earned it."
Fair enough. And it's probably safe to assume most of you don't subscribe to "childish" superstitions such as misfortune from walking under a ladder, breaking a mirror or seeing a black cat cross your path. In fact, you more than likely scorn these beliefs as primitive and irrational and assure yourself that you're above these silly notions.
But let's re-examine the notion of superstition. Psychologically speaking, superstitious behavior stems from the idea that a specific activity culminating in a positive result is the basis for that outcome, that cause-and-effect is immutable.
The action might or might not be functional (that is, it might affect someone or something else, or it might be self-contained and wholly irrelevant), but if something good follows, then we automatically attribute it to that particular behavior and repeat it for similar results.
Psychologist B.F. Skinner was among the first to highlight this inanity. In his experiments, a group of hungry pigeons was fed small pellets of grain after they twitched in a certain way. They learned to repeat the twitches because they thought this action led to food.
But outside this contrived situation, that twitching motion had nothing to do with getting fed - if your average pigeon on the street instinctually thought that food would just appear if it simply twitched a little, it would starve.
Sounds silly, doesn't it? We would never behave that way. We assure ourselves that we're more highly evolved than Skinner's pigeons.
But from my experience, "hungry" business people who are climbing the corporate ladder repeat certain behaviors all the time because they think it automatically will lead to money, recognition and promotion.
Superstition is merely the confusion of correlation and causality. Any human or animal tends to repeat any behavior that is followed by positive reinforcement (and avoid all actions that are followed by negative reinforcement).
One of the greatest mistakes people make, then, is the assumption, "I behave this way and achieve results. Therefore, I must be achieving results because I behave this way."
This belief is sometimes true but not across the board. That's where superstition kicks in. It's the core fallacy that necessitated my most recent book, What Got You Here Won't Get You There. (See? It's right there in the title.)
Almost everyone I meet is successful because of doing many things right, and almost everyone I meet is successful in spite of some behavior that defies common sense. Of course, that's the human condition - nobody's perfect.
One of my greatest challenges is helping leaders in organizations see the difference, understand that they're confusing "because of" and "in spite of" behaviors and avoid this superstition trap.
I've worked with innovators who insisted their cruel comments to colleagues were absolutely necessary because those pithy, memorable zingers led to some of their best ideas. Then, I ask them if they've ever met a nice person who's as creative as they are. That gets them thinking!
I've worked with salespeople who think their pushy, almost belligerent tactics with customers close more deals. But if that's true, I point out, then how do your friendlier co-workers manage to sell anything? Could your success be attributed to the fact that you're selling a great product or making more sales calls?
I've worked with executives who think their remote aloofness with direct reports is a controlled, calculated strategy to get people to think for themselves. I concede that fostering initiative among employees is the leader's job, but is this detached disposition legitimately designed to establish independence, or are you justifying it after the fact because that's who you are and you refuse to change? And where will you be if they've done all this thinking for themselves and something goes horribly wrong as a result? You'll be accountable, and you certainly won't be able to use your impassiveness as an excuse.
About the Author:
by Marshall Goldsmith, Ph.D.
[Talent Management Magazine November 2007]
Success can make us superstitious in how we behave. Specifically, four beliefs - that we have the skills, the confidence, the motivation and the choice to succeed - lead us to this mindset.
Some of you are probably thinking, "No way! I'm not superstitious. I know exactly why I'm successful: because I earned it."
Fair enough. And it's probably safe to assume most of you don't subscribe to "childish" superstitions such as misfortune from walking under a ladder, breaking a mirror or seeing a black cat cross your path. In fact, you more than likely scorn these beliefs as primitive and irrational and assure yourself that you're above these silly notions.
But let's re-examine the notion of superstition. Psychologically speaking, superstitious behavior stems from the idea that a specific activity culminating in a positive result is the basis for that outcome, that cause-and-effect is immutable.
The action might or might not be functional (that is, it might affect someone or something else, or it might be self-contained and wholly irrelevant), but if something good follows, then we automatically attribute it to that particular behavior and repeat it for similar results.
Psychologist B.F. Skinner was among the first to highlight this inanity. In his experiments, a group of hungry pigeons was fed small pellets of grain after they twitched in a certain way. They learned to repeat the twitches because they thought this action led to food.
But outside this contrived situation, that twitching motion had nothing to do with getting fed - if your average pigeon on the street instinctually thought that food would just appear if it simply twitched a little, it would starve.
Sounds silly, doesn't it? We would never behave that way. We assure ourselves that we're more highly evolved than Skinner's pigeons.
But from my experience, "hungry" business people who are climbing the corporate ladder repeat certain behaviors all the time because they think it automatically will lead to money, recognition and promotion.
Superstition is merely the confusion of correlation and causality. Any human or animal tends to repeat any behavior that is followed by positive reinforcement (and avoid all actions that are followed by negative reinforcement).
One of the greatest mistakes people make, then, is the assumption, "I behave this way and achieve results. Therefore, I must be achieving results because I behave this way."
This belief is sometimes true but not across the board. That's where superstition kicks in. It's the core fallacy that necessitated my most recent book, What Got You Here Won't Get You There. (See? It's right there in the title.)
Almost everyone I meet is successful because of doing many things right, and almost everyone I meet is successful in spite of some behavior that defies common sense. Of course, that's the human condition - nobody's perfect.
One of my greatest challenges is helping leaders in organizations see the difference, understand that they're confusing "because of" and "in spite of" behaviors and avoid this superstition trap.
I've worked with innovators who insisted their cruel comments to colleagues were absolutely necessary because those pithy, memorable zingers led to some of their best ideas. Then, I ask them if they've ever met a nice person who's as creative as they are. That gets them thinking!
I've worked with salespeople who think their pushy, almost belligerent tactics with customers close more deals. But if that's true, I point out, then how do your friendlier co-workers manage to sell anything? Could your success be attributed to the fact that you're selling a great product or making more sales calls?
I've worked with executives who think their remote aloofness with direct reports is a controlled, calculated strategy to get people to think for themselves. I concede that fostering initiative among employees is the leader's job, but is this detached disposition legitimately designed to establish independence, or are you justifying it after the fact because that's who you are and you refuse to change? And where will you be if they've done all this thinking for themselves and something goes horribly wrong as a result? You'll be accountable, and you certainly won't be able to use your impassiveness as an excuse.
About the Author:
Dr. Marshall Goldsmith is a world authority in helping successful leaders achieve positive, lasting change in behavior. He is the author or co-editor of 22 books, including The Wall Street Journal No. 1 business best-seller What Got You Here Won't Get You There.]
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Motivation / demotivation is an inner feeling and it should come from within . Also it is always changing & dynamic.Today we are in a highly competetive environment. So always have a possitive attitude and do your best . Over a period of time , even your own boss herself will realise your potential and give the credit due for your good work.After that in your life you need not look back.Then Success will come to you always in all ways.
Change is everywhere.
Change, before it’s too late. No one likes change. But if we are not changing ourselves with the requirement and expectation of the environment / customer then we will be thrown out by our competitors. We should understand that the word ‘ Change ‘ alone remains the same forever all other things are changing. The world is going to change and also change drastically. Hence we have to get a plan, a programme together to deal with a decade that was totally different. If we adapt ourselves to change then we will be having always -new products, new business, new competitors, new market, new environment and new greater heights in our life style also. The only question facing all of us is what are we going to do in response to the changing environment? If we find a suitable answer to this question then we will be able to participate effectively and add value creation in our day- to- day work. Hence one should accept the following points with open mind to achieve peak through participation. Be open to change. Remember resisting change is easy. Make sure that our employees embrace change. Always be ready to face reality.
One’s goal should be to transform business into the best or to the near best in the world. To help one to get there the strategy to be adapted is always be ready to face reality. It may sound simple but getting any group of people to see the world the way it is and not the way they wish it were or hope it will be, is not as easy as it sounds. It needs lot of restructuring and which is equivalent to business process reengineering concept. The following points will help to reengineer our efforts and to face reality in our day- to -day working environment.
Face reality – those who avoid reality are doomed to failure. Having faced reality, act on the reality – adapt business strategies to that reality. By doing this there is a chance that one can turn his business around. One can be sure that if he sticks on to this there is no question that you will fail.
Create a vision and then get out of the way.
Business is very simple. People who try to make it complex get themselves all wound around. To keep business simple, a good manager has to ask himself five questions as part of the process of making clear, swift decisions, but they must be the right five questions. What does your global competitive environment look like?
1. In the past three years, what have your competitors done?
2. How might they attack you in the near future?
3. In the same time period what have you done to them?
4. What are your plans to leap frog them?
Managing and participating is allocating right people and right resources, give them what they need and then get out of the way. Managers must lead with vision and then scream it from the rooftops.
WINNERS NEVER QUIT & QUITTERS NEVER WIN.
All the Best
Monday, April 20, 2009
First, plant 3 rows of peas;
- Patience
- Promptness
- Prayer
Next, plant 3 rows of squash;
- Squash gossip
- Squash indifference
- Squash criticism
Then, plant 4 rows of lettuce;
- Let us Obey the Lord
- Let us be Loyal
- Let us be true to our Obligations
- Let us be unselfish
Finish, with 4 rows of turnip;
- Turn up when Needed
- Turn up with a Smile
- Turn up with a Vision
- Turn up with Determination
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
If you gather 100 experienced leaders together to share with you their most important secrets for success, you probably wouldn’t hear a lot of academic theory or jargon. Instead, this is a good idea of what you’d hear:
1) Put ethics first.
If you make unethical decisions for short-term gain, you will lose in the end. Let your principles guide you in the many decisions you must make regarding business practices and people. You will regret it if you don’t.
2) Surround yourself with the best people you can find.
If you are able to attract the brightest, most dedicated, most talented people, they will move your organization forward. Leverage their skills, ideas and creativity… your people are your greatest asset.
3) Show your staff you value them personally.
Research shows the personal relationship with a direct manager is the key for retaining your best and your brightest. Don’t ever withhold your praise. Tell them why you value them and recognize their contributions.
4) Be trustworthy.
Be fair in your dealings with others. Don’t show favoritism. Remember you must always walk your talk. Your actions speak louder than your words. Don’t ask others to do what you can’t or won’t do. You can’t lead if others don’t trust you.
5) Develop Win-Win-Win Solutions.
Your company will only grow if you can provide valuable services that help your clients succeed. In the meantime, you must help your staff achieve their goals, and the organization must grow. A win-win-win approach means you create solutions and services that support the best interests of your client, your staff and your company. If one of these elements is missing, your business won’t grow. Don’t try to shortchange one element to the benefit of the other.
Reference:
By Susan Cullen
Reference:
By Susan Cullen
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Do you ever just wake up in the morning in a BAD mood?
Or maybe you stub your toe, spill your coffee, or burn your toast. Doesn't it seem that once one thing goes wrong, the whole day goes down hill?
The truth is that the reason the rest of the day goes wrong, is because of your bad mood. In other words, when you become angry about something that happens, you spend time focusing on it. And where attention goes, energy flows. This energy attracts other bad experiences. That's why it's so important to change your mood, ASAP!
5 Ways to Lift Your Mood
- Listen to music. Now, I don't mean the sappy music that always makes you cry. I mean something upbeat and happy. Music that makes your toes tap.
- Laugh. Laughter really is the BEST medicine because the easiest way to turn that frown upside down is by laughing. Watch a sitcom, rent a movie. Just remember to laugh out loud.
- Have a GO-TO memory. Think back over the years. What was a really good moment, something that always puts a smile on your face and a warm feeling in your heart? Learn to "flip out" of your bad mood by learning to "flip into" this sweet memory.
- Spend time with your pet. Is there anyone in your life that gives you more unconditional love than your pet? If you have a pet, you know the healing effect an animal can have on you.
- Call a friend. Now, you need to be careful with this one. You should have a good-time friend, someone that's fun and makes you feel good. This is the friend to call. You aren't calling to complain, you're calling to hear all of the wonderful and fun stories she has to share. Soon, you'll be looking up.
When you change your mood, your vibrational energy changes to positive. Soon you'll be seeing the silver lining and things won't seem so bad.
Reference:
Terri Klapperich is a heart-centered CEO teaching men and women HOW to heal emotional pain, tap into divine guidance, and create the life of their dreams. As YOU heal yourself, YOU heal the world. Take the "Live From Your Heart Challenge" at Tips from Terri .Get out of your head and start living from your heart.
Friday, April 10, 2009
It is easy to do nothing.
Yet what is easiest is not always what is best.
It is easy to hope for the best outcome.
To actually bring it about often requires difficult
and even painful decisions, actions and solid,
tangible commitment.
Yet what is easiest is not always what is best.
It is easy to hope for the best outcome.
To actually bring it about often requires difficult
and even painful decisions, actions and solid,
tangible commitment.
It is easy to criticize the actions of others,
particularly in hindsight, or to speculate about what
should have been done.
But nothing ever has been accomplished by criticism
or speculation alone.
Accomplishment comes from those who are willing
to put themselves on the line.
The world moves forward because of those people
who step up to do what is right and what is best,
rather than just what is easiest.
Taking the easy way out can often lead to results
that are not so easy to handle.
Doing nothing is easy to justify and easy to implement,
but in the long run it ends up being a difficult,
burdensome way to live.
Make your choices based not on what is easy,
but on what is best, and do what you know needs to be done.
That's the strategy to take you where you truly would like to be.
Reference:
Ralph Marston
Thursday, April 9, 2009
To Be Happier Change Your Attitude With a Simple Word.
0 comments Posted by Bloggers World at 8:23 AM
What do you say when someone asks you, "How are you doing?" Let's say you are enjoying a spectacular day. The sun is shining. You found the perfect parking place under a shade tree after a hassle-free drive to work. Everyone compliments you on your great new outfit. Absolutely everything is going your way.
You probably reply with a cheery, "Terrific!"
But what if every little thing is going wrong today and you are in one foul mood. In fact, you could just about chew off the head of the person who asked how you are doing. What do you reply? I bet you say something like "Awful" (only you may use a stronger word with fewer letters). Or you may offer the generic reply, "Fine."
Remember that your subconscious mind obeys your every command. Whatever words fall out of your mouth become its orders to fulfill. So your Terrific will lead to more events leaving you in a terrific mood.
And the "Awful" will, in turn, lead you to more events that leave you feeling awful. That is how the Law works.
How can you improve your day in this very moment and brighten the rest of the hours today? Pretty simple solution--regardless of how you think you feel--reply to "How are you doing?" with "Great! Excellent!" Use a word that, simply because you utter it with feeling--your whole demeanor switches into this feeling of yes!
Don't think about it. Just do it. Do that for a whole day. I bet you will notice a difference in how your day goes.You discovered the quickest solution to be happier.
Reference:
Ali Bierman shows you how to be happier by changing the unknown belief systems that stop you cold.
You probably reply with a cheery, "Terrific!"
But what if every little thing is going wrong today and you are in one foul mood. In fact, you could just about chew off the head of the person who asked how you are doing. What do you reply? I bet you say something like "Awful" (only you may use a stronger word with fewer letters). Or you may offer the generic reply, "Fine."
Remember that your subconscious mind obeys your every command. Whatever words fall out of your mouth become its orders to fulfill. So your Terrific will lead to more events leaving you in a terrific mood.
And the "Awful" will, in turn, lead you to more events that leave you feeling awful. That is how the Law works.
How can you improve your day in this very moment and brighten the rest of the hours today? Pretty simple solution--regardless of how you think you feel--reply to "How are you doing?" with "Great! Excellent!" Use a word that, simply because you utter it with feeling--your whole demeanor switches into this feeling of yes!
Don't think about it. Just do it. Do that for a whole day. I bet you will notice a difference in how your day goes.You discovered the quickest solution to be happier.
Reference:
Ali Bierman shows you how to be happier by changing the unknown belief systems that stop you cold.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Most of us never see our dreams come true. Instead of soaring through the clouds, our dreams languish like a broken-down airplane confined to its hangar. Through life, I have come to identify five common reasons why dreams don't take flight.
#1 We Have Been Discouraged from Dreaming by Others
We have to pilot our own dreams; we cannot entrust them to anyone else. People who aren't following their own dreams resent us pursuing ours. Such people feel inadequate when we succeed, so they try to drag us down.
If we listen to external voices, then we allow our dreams to be hijacked. At some point, other people will place limitations on us by doubting our abilities. When surrounded by the turbulence of criticism, we have to grasp the controls tightly to keep from being knocked off course.
#2 We Are Hindered by Past Disappointments and Hurts
In the movie Top Gun, Tom Cruise plays Maverick, a young, talented, and cocky aviator who dreams of being the premier pilot in the U.S. navy. In the film's opening scenes, Maverick showcases his flying ability but also displays a knack for pushing the envelope with regards to safety. Midway through the movie, Maverick's characteristic aggression spells disaster. His plane crashes, killing his best friend and co-pilot.
Although cleared of wrongdoing, the painful memory of the accident haunts Maverick. He quits taking risks and loses his edge. Struggling to regain his poise, he considers giving up on his dream. Although the incident nearly wrecks Maverick's career, he eventually reaches within to find the strength to return to the sky.
Like Maverick, many of us live with the memory of failure embedded in our psyche. Perhaps a business we started went broke, or we were fired from a position of leadership. Disappointment is the gap that exists between expectation and reality, and all of us have encountered that gap. Failure is a necessary and natural part of life, but if we're going to attain our dreams, then, like Maverick, we have to summon the courage deal with past hurts.
#3 We Fall into the Habit of Settling for Average
Average is the norm for a reason. Being exceptional demands extra effort, sustained inspiration, and uncommon discipline. When we attempt to give flight to our dreams, we have to overcome the weight of opposition. Like gravity, life's circumstances constantly pull on our dreams, tugging us down to mediocrity.
Most of us don't pay the price to overcome the opposition to our dreams. We may start out inspired, but through time we fatigue. Although never intending to abandon our dreams, we begin to make concessions here and there. Through time, our lives become mundane, and our dreams slip away.
#4 We Lack the Confidence Needed to Pursue Our Dreams
Dreams are fragile. They will be buffeted by assaults from all sides. As such, they must be supplied with the extra strength of self-confidence.
In Amelia Earhart's day, women were not supposed fly airplanes. If she had lacked self-assurance, she never would have even attempted to be a pilot. Instead, Earhart confidently chased after her dream, and she was rewarded with both fulfillment and fame.
#5 We Lack the Imagination to Dream
For thousands of years, mankind traveled along the ground: by foot, by horse-and-buggy, by locomotive, and eventually by automobile. Thanks to the dreams of Orville and Wilbur Wright, we now hop across oceans in a matter of hours. The imaginative brothers overcame ridicule and doubt to pioneer human flight, and the world has never been the same.
Many of us play small because we do not allow ourselves to dream. We trap ourselves in reality and never dare to go beyond what we can see with our eyes. Imagination lifts us beyond average by giving us a vision of life that surpasses what we are experiencing currently. Dreams infuse our spirit with energy and spur us on to greatness.
Dreams
"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character."
~ Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
"If I were to wish for anything, I should not wish for wealth and power, but for the passionate sense of the potential, for the eye which, ever young and ardent, sees the possible. Pleasure disappoints, possibility never." ~ Søren Kierkegaard
"Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe."
~ Gail Devers
"I have learned, that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours."
~ Henry David Thoreau
Reference:
Dr. John C. Maxwell
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
1. Tell yourself a positive story. Life is a story. The story we tell ourselves and the role we play in that story determines the quality and direction of our life. The best real estate professionals are able to overcome adversity by telling themselves a more positive story than the rest. Instead of a drama or a horror movie, they define their life as an inspirational tale. Instead of being the victim, they see themselves as a fighter and overcomer. You may not be able to control market conditions, but you can influence the outcome of your story.
2. Model yourself after success.
2. Model yourself after success.
Are there real estate practitioners succeeding today? Of course there are. Seek out those people in your market and ask to meet with them. Learn from their advice and model their attitudes and actions. If they can succeed, so can you.
3. Focus on the important stuff.
3. Focus on the important stuff.
Tune out the negative voices and start making positive choices. What are you doing on a daily basis to grow yourself, your team, and your business? Don’t focus on the negative things other salespeople and the media are saying. Instead, focus on marketing your business, taking care of clients, and building loyal relationships. Every morning ask yourself this question: "What are the three most important things I need to do today that will help me create the success I desire?" Then take action on those items.
4. Replace "have to" with "get to."
4. Replace "have to" with "get to."
This simple word swap can change your mind-set and your approach to work and life. It turns a complaining voice to an appreciative voice, and acknowledges that life is a gift—not an obligation. So often we grudgingly say things like "I have to go to this meeting," "I have to meet with this client," or "I have to sell houses in this market." In reality, it’s not about what we have to do. It’s about what we get to do. Research shows that when we practice gratitude, we get a measurable boost in happiness that energizes us and enhances our health. It’s also physiologically impossible to be stressed and thankful at the same time.
5. Refuse to participate in the recession.
5. Refuse to participate in the recession.
Professionals who’ve thrived during past recessions continued to go about business as usual regardless of market conditions. They worked hard and focused on taking actions to grow their business. As others are paralyzed by fear, take the opportunity to charge forward.
6. Boost your marketing and advertising.
6. Boost your marketing and advertising.
It may seem counterintuitive to spend more money on advertising and marketing right now. But with so many of your competitors cutting back in these areas, this is a great opportunity to build your brand and gain market share. People are still buying and selling, and they will buy from those whom they trust and see in the marketplace.
7. Create a positive vision.
7. Create a positive vision.
Instead of being disappointed about where you are, make the decision to be optimistic about where you are going. Create a positive vision for your future and the future of your team. Vision helps you see the road ahead and it gives you something meaningful and valuable to strive towards.
8. Invite others on your bus.
8. Invite others on your bus.
Invite colleagues and customers to board your bus for a positive ride. Send them an e-bus ticket at www.TheEnergyBus.com. Share your vision with team members and ask them to join you in making this vision a reality. Be a positive influence.
9. No more complaining.
9. No more complaining.
Abide by the "no complaining" rule. When you realize you’re about to complain, replace your thoughts and words with positive actions. Let your complaints help you identify what you don’t want so that you can focus on what you do want. The key is to turn complaints into solutions.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Happiness is a serious business - both personally & professionally.
0 comments Posted by Bloggers World at 1:58 AMIts importance at personal level is easier to understand ; not so easy to appreciate but equally important is happiness of human capital to any organization's bottom line. Happy, healthy people create the ultimate competitive advantage. It makes a strong business sense. Stressed, negative, unfit, grumpy people will neutralize the advantage of any good technology or product.
Lasting happiness is the eternal quest of every form of life. Everything that we do – not just we humans, but other sentient forms of life also – is to find happiness. We earn to be happy, we spend to be happy ; we work to be happy, we take a break from work to be happy ; we wake up every morning to continue our search for happiness, and at night we retire to find happiness from the post- work restfulness of sleep - sleep is like an unconscious meditation. All our lives, we live in search of happiness, and through death we move on to other realms in the same perennial quest.
There can be no happiness without health, unless of course one has entirely transcended body consciousness, such as Sri Ramakrishna Paramahansa who could dance in joy with a bleeding cancer in his throat had done, or Sri Ramana Maharshi, who too had cancer, but could smile in deep bliss. Such saints actually take the karma of their disciples to work out on their own bodies, out of their limitless compassion.
Now, physical health is impossible without a reasonably peaceful mind which in turn must be anchored in the reason of the intellect. The sensory mind which governs the five senses, is the lower mind, because it gets easily bribed by the sensory inputs. It only understands pleasure and pain. The discriminating intellect with all its reasoning faculty, is our higher mind, and it tries to tell the lower mind what is good for it and what is not, regardless of whether it is pleasurable or unpleasurable. Pain is an important part of life's learning, but suffering is optional through attitudes, through how we pertceive the challenge.
Right eating is crucial to good physical health. We become what we eat – the gross part of our food builds the body, the fine part (the subtle sattwic / rajasic / tamasic nature of what we eat) builds the mind. Fresh seasonal vegetables and fruits, nuts (esp. almonds), milk and milk products and well cooked cereals are good for us ; non- veg, preserved (`dead') food, processed and highly spiced foods should be abstained from. There are several scientific reasons in
favour of a vegetarian diet.
Equally important for good physical health is daily exercise. A doctor in the West recently said, if exercises could be packed in a pill, it will be the world's most selling drug. But it cannot be
done ; we just have to do them. Brisk walk, Yoga, cycling, swimming, playing outdoor games, light/moderate gym activity etc are great help. Controlled diet and daily exercise can effectively cure the dreaded modern disease of obesity with the offshoots of hypertension, diabetes, cardiac ailments etc. Daily adequate sleep and rest, good hygiene etc are also important to physical wellness.
Mental peace, so essential to sustained good physical health, is best obtained by daily Pranayama and an introspective management of ego-driven emotions. This will also keep our relationships healthy and promote all-round happiness.
So we see, happiness is not pleasure. It demands discipline that can be bitter in doing but sweet in results. When we eat and sleep right, love our work, do daily exercise and Pranayama, we shall gradually be closer to a purification where meditation becomes possible.
Meditation, coupled with right living and right activity, will introduce us to the true bliss – the ultimate happiness – at spiritual level. Then love becomes our nature and we always live in
an indescribable tranquility where multi-level wellness is a by- product.
The physical disciplines mentioned above, the right living principles, daily Pranayama and meditation will together create grounds for a lasting wellness and true happiness. Our bad habits will then fall off, uprooted from the field of consciousness like useless weeds. It is hard to re-engineer habits unless we develop our self-awareness and will. Habits are mental automatic machines, they force us to do things against our will. Pranayama and Meditation bring about what modern science calls 'neuro-plasticity of the brain' ; they re-wire the brain circuits and cauterize the brain cells, creating newer, better neural pathways.
So friends, happiness is our ultimate quest ; it is our serious business - both personally and professionally.
Cheers,
Reference:
Hans Dholakia
Lasting happiness is the eternal quest of every form of life. Everything that we do – not just we humans, but other sentient forms of life also – is to find happiness. We earn to be happy, we spend to be happy ; we work to be happy, we take a break from work to be happy ; we wake up every morning to continue our search for happiness, and at night we retire to find happiness from the post- work restfulness of sleep - sleep is like an unconscious meditation. All our lives, we live in search of happiness, and through death we move on to other realms in the same perennial quest.
There can be no happiness without health, unless of course one has entirely transcended body consciousness, such as Sri Ramakrishna Paramahansa who could dance in joy with a bleeding cancer in his throat had done, or Sri Ramana Maharshi, who too had cancer, but could smile in deep bliss. Such saints actually take the karma of their disciples to work out on their own bodies, out of their limitless compassion.
Now, physical health is impossible without a reasonably peaceful mind which in turn must be anchored in the reason of the intellect. The sensory mind which governs the five senses, is the lower mind, because it gets easily bribed by the sensory inputs. It only understands pleasure and pain. The discriminating intellect with all its reasoning faculty, is our higher mind, and it tries to tell the lower mind what is good for it and what is not, regardless of whether it is pleasurable or unpleasurable. Pain is an important part of life's learning, but suffering is optional through attitudes, through how we pertceive the challenge.
Right eating is crucial to good physical health. We become what we eat – the gross part of our food builds the body, the fine part (the subtle sattwic / rajasic / tamasic nature of what we eat) builds the mind. Fresh seasonal vegetables and fruits, nuts (esp. almonds), milk and milk products and well cooked cereals are good for us ; non- veg, preserved (`dead') food, processed and highly spiced foods should be abstained from. There are several scientific reasons in
favour of a vegetarian diet.
Equally important for good physical health is daily exercise. A doctor in the West recently said, if exercises could be packed in a pill, it will be the world's most selling drug. But it cannot be
done ; we just have to do them. Brisk walk, Yoga, cycling, swimming, playing outdoor games, light/moderate gym activity etc are great help. Controlled diet and daily exercise can effectively cure the dreaded modern disease of obesity with the offshoots of hypertension, diabetes, cardiac ailments etc. Daily adequate sleep and rest, good hygiene etc are also important to physical wellness.
Mental peace, so essential to sustained good physical health, is best obtained by daily Pranayama and an introspective management of ego-driven emotions. This will also keep our relationships healthy and promote all-round happiness.
So we see, happiness is not pleasure. It demands discipline that can be bitter in doing but sweet in results. When we eat and sleep right, love our work, do daily exercise and Pranayama, we shall gradually be closer to a purification where meditation becomes possible.
Meditation, coupled with right living and right activity, will introduce us to the true bliss – the ultimate happiness – at spiritual level. Then love becomes our nature and we always live in
an indescribable tranquility where multi-level wellness is a by- product.
The physical disciplines mentioned above, the right living principles, daily Pranayama and meditation will together create grounds for a lasting wellness and true happiness. Our bad habits will then fall off, uprooted from the field of consciousness like useless weeds. It is hard to re-engineer habits unless we develop our self-awareness and will. Habits are mental automatic machines, they force us to do things against our will. Pranayama and Meditation bring about what modern science calls 'neuro-plasticity of the brain' ; they re-wire the brain circuits and cauterize the brain cells, creating newer, better neural pathways.
So friends, happiness is our ultimate quest ; it is our serious business - both personally and professionally.
Cheers,
Reference:
Hans Dholakia
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
A VERY TOUCHING STORY!
My mom only had one eye. I hated her... she was such an embarrassment. My mom ran a small shop at a flea market. She collected little weeds and such to sell... anything for the money we needed she was such an embarrassment. There was this one day during elementary school. I remember that it was field day, and my mom came. I was so embarrassed.
My mom only had one eye. I hated her... she was such an embarrassment. My mom ran a small shop at a flea market. She collected little weeds and such to sell... anything for the money we needed she was such an embarrassment. There was this one day during elementary school. I remember that it was field day, and my mom came. I was so embarrassed.
How could she do this to me? I threw her a hateful look and ran out. The next day at school..."Your mom only has one eye?!" and they taunted me.
I wished that my mom would just disappear from this world so I said to my mom, "Mom, why don't you have the other eye?! You're only going to make me a laughingstock. Why don't you just die?" My mom did not respond. I guess I felt a little bad, but at the same time, it felt good to think that I had said what I'd wanted to say all this time.
Maybe it was because my mom hadn't punished me, but I didn't think that I had hurt her feelings very badly.
That night...I woke up, and went to the kitchen to get a glass of water. My mom was crying there, so quietly, as if she was afraid that she might wake me. I took a look at her, and then turned away. Because of the thing I had said to her earlier, there was something pinching at me in the corner of my heart. Even so, I hated my mother who was crying out of her one eye. So I told myself that I would grow up and become successful, because I hated my one-eyed mom and our desperate poverty.
Then I studied really hard. I left my mother and came to Seoul and studied, and got accepted in the Seoul University with all the confidence I had. Then, I got married. I bought a house of my own. Then I had kids, too. Now I'm living happily as a successful man. I like it here because it's a place that doesn't remind me of my mom.
This happiness was getting bigger and bigger, when someone unexpected came to see me "What?! Who's this?!" ...It was my mother...Still with her one eye. It felt as if the whole sky was falling apart on me. My little girl ran away, scared of my mom's eye.
And I asked her, "Who are you? I don't know you!!!" as if I tried to make that real. I screamed at her "How dare you come to my house and scare my daughter! GET OUT OF HERE! NOW!!!" And to this, my mother quietly answered, "oh, I'm so sorry. I may have gotten the wrong address," and she disappeared. Thank good ness... she doesn't recognize me. I was quite relieved. I told myself that I wasn't going to care, or think about this for the rest of my life.
Then a wave of relief came upon me...one day, a letter regarding a school reunion came to my house. I lied to my wife saying that I was going on a business trip. After the reunion, I went down to the old shack, that I used to call a house...just out of curiosity there, I found my mother fallen on the cold ground. But I did not shed a single tear. She had a piece of paper in her hand.... it was a letter to me.
She wrote:
My son...
I think my life has been long enough now. And... I won't visit Seoul anymore... but would it be too much to ask if I wanted you to come visit me once in a while? I miss you so much. And I was so glad when I heard you were coming for the reunion. But I decided not to go to the school.... For you... I'm sorry that I only have one eye, and I was an embarrassment for you.
You see, when you were very little, you got into an accident, and lost your eye. As a mother, I couldn't stand watching you having to grow up with only one eye... so I gave you mine...I was so proud of my son that was seeing a whole new world for me, in my place, with that eye. I was never upset at you for anything you did. The couple times that you were angry with me. I thought to myself, 'it's because he loves me.' I miss the times when you were still young around me.
I miss you so much. I love you. You mean the world to me.
My world shattered!!!
Then I cried for the person who lived for me... My Mother
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