Friday, November 13, 2009

Coping With Emotional Infidelity

By Benedict Perez

A form of adultery, emotional infidelity takes place when a person yearns for companionship and close intimacy from someone else and not from the spouse. This typically initiates when a person gets into tight relations with someone whom he or she feels suitable enough to share too secret and intimate matters that are supposed to be maintained only between husband and wife.

As a result, that person feels comfortably close and blindly reliant upon the other person's company because of the aura of confidence and ambience of intimacy created. Due to the constant confiding, chatting, or even hanging out, the person then senses an emotional attachment that becomes more and more serious thereby resulting to a certain feeling of happiness and security. This is very dangerous, as it can lead to physical intimacy if not immediately put to a halt.

There are many things that can help stimulate this kind of craving for emotional infidelity, usually in the guise of seemingly harmless activities or activities in good faith. Correspondingly, there are ways too to limit these dangerous longings. The marriage, above all, must be valued and treasured. Its sanctity must be respected and nourished.

One must be free from external influences that encourage cheating and infidelity. Pornography, for one, should be avoided in all forms, whether print or television or even in the web. Take extra care in dealing with members of the opposite sex by ensuring that nothing goes beyond the limit of friendship and the spirit of camaraderie. It is also great to have regular talks with a close married friend to have a guide on the dos and don'ts in marriage.

But absolutely no one is faultless. Man is at risk to temptation. The flesh is weak. Nevertheless, that does not mean that man has no preference. Man still has a choice on whether or not to give in to the lures of sin. Yes, these thoughts on emotional infidelity are inexorable, but there is an option on whether to dwell on them or to disregard them as just thoughts. Therefore, one should have the zeal to stay pure and loyal to the vows of marriage, both in heart and in the mind, in order to maintain its sacredness.

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